CIA: Cullens In Action
by Mournful Wolf
Summary: The Cullens take a trip to Italy, but their vacation is interupted by an unexpected visitor... Cars/Esme
1. Alone Time

**CIA: Cullens-In-Action  
**

**By Mournful Wolf**

**A vampire serial killer is on the loose in Italy just when the Cullens were ready to go on vacation. Now it is up to our favorite vampire family to save the country! Story has mostly CarlislexEsme.  
**

**Note to fangirls: Without Carlisle, there would be no Edward, therefore no EdwardxBella and the Twilight series wouldn't exist. :3**

**This chapter may have nothing to do with the Italy trip, but this is to just give you the first taste of awesome CarlislexEsme fluff!**

**Chapter 1: Alone Time**

Esme was laying in her bedroom, spread lengthwise across the bed and her head dangling off one side. A black video Ipod rested across her sternum, the cord snaking between her breasts.

Her lips moved as she sang along to the music and closed her eyes, enjoying the alone time. Carlisle leaned against the wall and watched her, waiting for her to notice him. Her caramel hair draped down the side of the bed to pool on the floor. She looked more like a twenty year old than the century-old vampire he knew her to be.

Her nostrils flared for a second, then she opened her eyes with a smile. "Hello, honey. How was work?" She asked, sitting up and holding out her arms.  
He walked forward to sit on the edge of the bed and pulled her into his lap. "Horrible. There was this beautiful woman who kept running through my mind all day. I just couldn't stop seeing her face."

"Hmmm. Well, I think your day was similar to mine, then. I had an incredibly handsome guy in mine though." She smirked.

"Oh, really? Do I have to kill this guy?" He grinned down at her.

"That may prove a little difficult. How about you just kiss me instead? You know, to help me forget?"

"That may just be the best idea I've heard all day." Carlisle leaned down to her, brushing feather-light kisses across her mouth before gently nipping her bottom lip. She moaned and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him closer and deepening the kiss.

"Have you forgotten yet, woman?" He asked with a teasing light in his eye.

"Not quite yet. I think I may need some more help with that." She kissed him this time, immediately pulling his body in line with hers.  
The Ipod, forgotten, fell to the floor at their feet; the resulting thud causing them both to jump.

"I'm glad you're home." Esme said as she tucked her face into the side of his neck.

"I'm glad to be home." Carlisle kissed her temple, pushing back the satiny strands of her hair. "Where's the family?"

"Alice and Jasper are in their room listening to music, Emmett and Rosalie are in the garage working on the M3, Edward is out hunting, and I don't know where Bella's gotten to." She answered, ticking off on the digits of her fingers.

"So we're completely alone?" He asked, swirling his fingers on the sensitive skin of her back.

"Yep." She answered breathlessly.

"Well, that's new." He said, blinking in surprise.

"Yep." She kissed him on the corner of his mouth.

"We should make the most of this." He said.

"How are you still talking?" She kissed down his neck.

"I have no idea." He pulled her up for a kiss and they had laid back on the bed when they heard a throat clear from the doorway. Bella was standing in the arch, bright red.

"I'm so sorry. I was looking for Edward." She said, turning to leave.

"It's quite all right. He's out hunting, Bella."

"Thanks." She practically ran back to their bedroom. They heard a minor thump and a muttered curse before the door to Edward's room closed.

"Well that was interesting." Esme said, blinking.

"Would you like to get back to what we were doing?"

"Very much so, Mr. Cullen."

"Your wish, my command, Mrs. Cullen." He leaned back down for another kiss, catching her lips just as they turned up in a smile.

**I'm thinking of expanding the story. Should I??**


	2. Flight to Italy

**After much requests from people, I have decided to develop a second chapter! Yay! **

**Chapter 2: Flight to Italy**

"So, let me get this straight," Alice said. "For summer vacation we're going to Italy to visit your Volturi amigos?"

"Yup." Carlisle was stuffing his clothes into his slender suitcase. "You have no idea how excited Aro is. I'm excited too; I haven't seen him in forever."

"Speaking of Aro…" Upstairs Edward was busy packing up his selected CDs. "He wouldn't stop talking about you when Alice and I were there. You were the only thing on his mind that time."

"Dude, that sounds so wrong."

"Oh, shut up Emmett."

Emmett snickered.

"Oh my gosh!" Alice piped up. "I can finally get a taste of real Italian gelato, and not to mention all the pizza and spaghetti…"

"Have you forgotten, my dear? You're going to have to cough it up later." Jasper said teasingly.

"That's what I hate about being a vampire." Alice grumbled.

Esme glided into the cavernous living room with all her belongings packed and ready. "I look forward to visiting the countryside; I heard that the landscapes can be quite beautiful there." Besides working on her architecture hobbies, Esme loved to paint landscapes.

"So Carlisle, which airline are we going to take?" Edward asked.

"Air France, I think. That's the only airline to Europe. From France we can take a train to Italy. Okay, is everyone ready?"

Following Carlisle's question came a chorus of "Yup".

"Whoo! Volterra, here we come!" Emmett hollered.

-**5 hours of terminal checkup later-**

The family was finally done with the monotonous checkup process and was now boarding the plane.

"Yay! Yay! We finally get to go on the plane!" Emmett clapped his hands together like a little kid who was getting a new toy.

"Hush, Emmett." Rosalie muttered furiously. "You're embarrassing me."

"Carlisle, which seats did you order?" Esme inquired.

"First class, of course. The greatest spouse in the world only deserves the greatest that has to be offered." Esme giggled lightly as Carlisle kissed the top of her head.

Jasper, who simply couldn't stand the ways of romance, rolled his eyes.

As soon as the first class passengers were seated, the Cullens waited for another half an hour for all passengers to board the plane. Then the plane's intercom came on, and  
the announcer went on about safety hazards, plane procedures and all that other good stuff.

"…And thank you for choosing Air France airlines for your trip to Europe."

"This _is _the only one going to Europe." Carlisle mumbled as the intercom went off.

And only too soon, the intercom went on again.

"In a few minutes we are preparing to take off. During this time all electronics: including cellphones, laptops, and MP3s must be turned off."

Edward groaned and switched off his MP3 player. Beside him Bella was flipping through a brochure that was completely in Czechoslovakian.

"You must be really bored, huh?"

"Ya think?" Bella replied.

"Hey, that thing's outdated." Edward took a look at the brochure's cover. "Czechoslovakia doesn't exist anymore. It split into the Czech Republic and Slovakia, and the languages spoken are either Czech or Slovak.  
What idiot came up with a Czechoslovakian brochu—"

"Oh shut up, Ed." Emmett kicked back in his chair, much to the annoyance of an elderly lady sitting in front of him. "You sound like our World Geography teacher."

Suddenly, the deep hum of the airplane's engine could be felt and heard. The plane started moving down the tracks slowly. Then it started to pick up more speed. Everyone had a different reaction as the plane shuttled off into the sky.

Esme craned her neck toward the window, watching the buildings and the trees shrink rapidly into green and gray patches.

Carlisle was also looking at the window, but he had a limited view due to the fact that Esme insisted that she wanted to be closest to the side.

Alice started chewing her gum like crazy.

Jasper laid his head back to gaze into the ceiling.

Edward did the same thing.

Emmett was literally spazzing out and even had his hands in the air.

Rosalie had her face buried in a thick fashion magazine, trying very hard to ignore her obnoxious husband.

And Bella flipped through the Czechoslovakian brochure as if she wasn't even in an airplane.

After the plane was high in the cloudy sky, the intercom hummed on.

"You are now free to turn on your electronics."

Simultaneously Edward and Jasper whipped out their MP3 and PSP.

Emmett was watching the TV screen attached to the seat in front of him. "Hey…I just noticed that on an airplane they show the movie Titanic, and on the cruise they showed Flightplan."  
He beamed widely as if he just made an important discovery.

Rosalie's voice dripped with sarcasm. "Gee, I wonder why."

"This is going to be a long, long flight…" She mumbled.

**I know that there isn't much CarlislexEsme in this chapter, but I can assure you that there will be more to come on the next chapter. Expect a lot of fluffiness and gelato!**


	3. Visit to Volterra

**I know this is confusing, with the change of title and all.  
But it'll still have the CarlislexEsme fluff in it, I promise you.  
There's going to be a lot of Italian words (they will be specially marked in Italics), so I took the time to provide you some translations at the bottom! It's fun learning a new language while reading about your favorite Twilight characters. Yippee! **

**Chapter 3: Visit to Volterra**

It was in the evening when the plane finally arrived at the airway of Paris, France. The Cullens took their luggage and made their way out of the terminal to catch the taxi.

"Since they're so many of us, we'll have to get two taxis." Carlisle said.

When the taxis arrived, Carlisle laid out the plans. "Emmett, Edward, Esme and I are taking the first taxi. Rosalie, Jasper, Alice and Bella are taking the second one. Okay, any questions?"

"B-b-but Carlisle!" Emmett moaned dramatically. "I want to sit with Rosalie! We belong together!"

Rosalie grimaced and took a tiny step back. Seeing her desperation to be away from Emmett for a little while, Edward said:

"Come on, Emmett. The drive's only going to take ten minutes."

Before the big vampire could protest, Jasper quickly shoved him into the back of the yellow vehicle.

"Alice, since the back can only fit three, you're going to have to sit on my lap."

Alice's little angelic face beamed. "Yay! I get to sit on Jazzy's lap!" Bella and Rosalie followed them into the car with amused expressions.

"Wait…" Esme said. "If our car can take three, how will all four of us fit in?"

Carlisle's face broke into a playful grin. "Then you will have to sit on my lap, _mon cheri_." Esme couldn't help but blush a light pink.  
Without further ado, the Cullens got into the taxis and were going to the subway. Inside the first taxi, Edward, Carlisle and Esme tried their very hardest to ignore Emmett, who was making comments on nearly everything.

"Whoa, the steering wheel on this car is on the right instead of the left!"

**5 minutes later… **"All the cars here are so small! How can people like me even survive??"

**Another 5 minutes later… "**Whoa, look at that huge Notre Dame cathedral! Does the Pope live there?"

Edward smacked a hand to his face and groaned. Carlisle and Esme leaned against each other and looked out the car window, pretending that they didn't hear their dim-witted son. To their relief, the taxi stopped at the subway entrance and everyone hopped out.

After Carlisle thanked and paid the drivers a good dose of euros, the family hurried to catch the train to Italy.  
I wouldn't bother to tell you about the trip, because it was pretty much the same as the ride on the airplane. The only thing different is that Bella was reading a brochure in Italian, not Czechoslovakian.

**One train ride later…**

As soon as the family stepped out from the train station, Carlisle spread out his arms and faced the rest of his family.

"_Benvenuto a Italia, _guys!"

Esme breathed in the clean, European air (although oxygen wasn't necessary for her), and sighed in content.

"Aah…it smells a thousand times cleaner than the whole U.S put together!"

Alice also took in a deep breath. "I smell noodles and meatballs…and gelato! Carlisle, can we go get some? Pretty pleeeeeaase!"

The leader of the Cullen clan took one look of Alice's big goo-goo eyes and chuckled. "Not until we arrive at the Volturi's _castello. _We can't go spending our money with our luggage being dragged around."

On the contrary to Carlisle's last comment, the vampires had no problem getting their stuff to the Volturi's place with their supernatural speed and strength. When the family arrived at the gates, the two Volturi guards Felix and Demetri were there to assist them in transporting their luggage inside.  
The Cullens gaped in amazement when they entered through the impressive Roman-styled halls of the castle. Even the talkative Emmett was speechless for a moment. Esme immediately fell in love with the castle's architecture and structure. Carlisle looked as if he was back home again.  
The family followed behind Felix and Demetri, and they stopped where the halls opened out into a cavernous interior plaza. While the Cullens were once again looking around in awe, Carlisle was looking around in confusion.

"Say…where are those three friends of mi-"

Suddenly a black ghostlike shape hurtled into Carlisle from behind. Carlisle and the scary-looking shape sprawled onto the floor, and before the Cullen boys could spring to attack the intruder, the cloaked person picked up Carlisle from the floor and tightly embraced him.

"Carlisle, _mi amigo, _it's been much too long!"

Marcus and Caius flew out from behind the family and also tackled Carlisle playfully, though not as hard.

"Aro's right, we haven't seen you in nearly two hundred years!" said Marcus.

"It's good to have a little family reunion once in a while." Caius said cheerfully.

Carlisle and the Volturi trio then started talking excitedly in Italian. The rest of the Cullens stood by in the background waiting patiently and awkwardly. Finally, Aro took a glance at Esme and turned to her.

"You must be Carlisle's _Tesoro, _no?"

Carlisle chuckled. "Yup. She's my mate, all right." He put an arm around her shoulder so that she wouldn't feel intimidated by all the Volturi vampires. (Wouldn't you feel scared if you had a pack of cloaked, red-eyed vampires staring at you like a piece of delicious meat?)

Caius grinned widely. "It's good to finally meet the rest of your _familia. _You're a news sensation to the vampire world, you know that? Next to us, yours is the largest coven we have ever met."

Carlisle grinned back. "Well, we hope that we wouldn't get too much attention from the humans. It's bad enough if we have the rest of our kind knowing about us already."

Aro winked. "Don't worry, _amico. _Leave it to us to take care of the rest of them."

While Carlisle and the Volturi had been conversing, Alice was constantly tugging on Carlisle's sleeve to get his attention. Carlisle got to the point where he could no longer tolerate the insistent tugging. He finally looked down at her.

"Yes, Alice?" The normally calm vampire had a hint of exasperation in his voice.

"Carlisle, you've been talking since the dawn of time, and now I'm really, really hungry for some gelato."

"Gelato you say, _signora piccola?" _Felix said. "I know the best places where you could simply gorge yourself with the best of Italy's ice cream."

"Sounds good to me!" Alice piped. "Bella, you wanna come?"

"Uh, sure."

With Alice's tiny hand engulfed by Felix's own gargantuan fist, the two vampires walked out the doors, with Bella following behind, to get some ice cream.

After they left, Aro turned to the remaining Cullens. "And of course, it is our job to provide the utmost hospitality to our honored guests. Feel free to do whatever you'd like in our city. Just don't be out in the sun around noon to three o' clock. That is all. Have fun!"

Xx0xX

The Cullen family parted in different directions to enjoy their leisure time in Italy.

Carlisle and Esme retreated to the countryside for peace and quiet and time for themselves.

Rosalie went on a shopping spree to spend money on the latest Italian trends.

Jasper was away at the Vatican to get a tour of the church, and hopefully see the cardinals or the pope.

Emmett spent his time in the _Motoguzzi _shop to admire and drool over the impressive and expensive _Vespas. _

Since this story was made mainly for Carlisle and Esme, let us allow ourselves to focus on that couple and how they enjoyed their time in the Italian countryside.

Xx0xX

Carlisle and Esme were thoroughly enjoying their stroll in the fresh, windblown meadows. In front of them were hills of green that seemed to go on and on until they stopped at the mountains that were thousands of feet away. The couple took their time walking down the road so that they won't overlook a single creation of nature.

"I love it how the sky is so soft and blue, even when there is no sun and just a few puffy clouds. It's almost magical." Esme breathed.

She stopped to admire the sky some more. "Honey, do you have a camera with you?"

"I didn't bring it for the trip. I always thought that your artistic creations could capture moments better than any camera."

The two soul mates gazed at each other fondly for a moment, then realization seemed to dawn on Esme.

"Oh, I almost forgot I even brought it with me!" Esme set down her backpack and pulled out several Pastelbords and a box of oil pastels in assorted colors. "Although painting on canvas is the ideal thing, I couldn't imagine packing a whole sheet of it."

"Don't worry. You could always paint it at home." Carlisle suggested.

"Hmm. Good idea."

Esme looked around for a little bit, then she spotted a hill with several trees on it. "Let's go up there. It's the perfect spot."

With amazing and flawless vampire speed the couple easily loped up the hill without any problem. They sat under a large sycamore, with Esme on Carlisle's lap. Carlisle saw why it was indeed the perfect spot; the hill gave them an excellent view of both the sky and the meadows below them.

"Do you mind if I watch you?" Carlisle's soft, cool breath tickled his wife's ear.

Usually Esme preferred to reside in her room by herself and drew whatever stimulates her imagination, but she was happy to make a special exception.

"Not at all, dear." She replied. "You're hardly a distraction to me."

Carlisle wrapped his arms around her waist and laid his head gently on her shoulder as she began to sketch out some lines.

And for the next few hours Carlisle watched silently and admirably as Esme progressed from making rough sketch lines to filling it in with the pastel colors.  
For the sky she alternated the blue and white pastel and made the colors softly blend in together with a Q-tip. She then switched to the yellow and green colors to work on the grassy terrain below the sky. Most of the meadows were creamy and warm-colored with a touch of blue and black to indicate the shade that clouds have cast on the grass.  
Each touch Esme applied to the artwork made Carlisle admire her sheer talent more and more.  
After she was done drawing the meadows she started drawing the hill and the sycamore tree they were sitting under. Next to the tree she used a dark brown pastel to shape out a four-legged animal that had its head tossed back to gaze into the sky and far-reaching antlers that crowned its skull.

Carlisle realized that she was drawing a stag, his favorite prey to hunt.

Esme sighed and lifted her hand off of the paper. "There. All done. How do you like it?"

"Words cannot describe how beautiful and stunning your gift to me is." Carlisle kissed Esme's cheek fondly. "It's definitely going to become the centerpiece of my office." She leaned back to lay her head against his chest. "I'm glad you like it, dear."

As the two relaxed under the sycamore, they were oblivious to everything except for the presence of each other.

Xx0xX

"So Bella, how did you like that _vaniglia francese _gelato I ordered for you?"

"Mmf. Delicious." Bella's mouth was stuffed with gelato and a spoon.

Alice, Bella and Felix walked through the _Palazzo del Priori _and ate their gelato on the way back to the Volturi's lair. A few people turned to stare at the peculiar trio. Alice nudged Bella and Bella turned to look. Alice held up her _fragola_-flavored ice cream and she put her mouth to it.  
Strawberry syrup dripped down from the corners of her lips.

"Hey Bella! This syrup looks like blood!"

Bella immediately regretted looking. She quickly turned away, her face a little green. "Alice, please. Wipe that off your face." She said weakly.

"Oh, sorry. I forgot that you have a baby stomach."

The company turned a corner to get into the alley. Then a small dark-haired boy popped out of nowhere, and scared the pants out of them.

"_Supplementare! Supplementare! Leggagli tutti!" _Since the boy was fairly short, he was waving a rolled-up newspaper in Alice's face.  
Felix grabbed the newspaper from the boy and used to emphasize his sweeping gesture.

"You're not supposed to loiter around here! _Accenda, shoo!" _ Felix said sternly.

The boy gave a cheeky grin, then he picked up his knapsack filled with newspapers and ran off into the plaza to get everyone else's attention.

Felix was about to toss away the newspaper when something caught his eye. He unrolled it,and as he read the main article his red-hued eyes popped open as wide as saucers.

"_Santa Maria. Per l'amor di Dio_!" he breathed.

Alice was dying to know what Felix is so worked up about.

"What? What? What is it? I want to see!" Alice jumped up and down in attempt to see the newspaper that was well above her head.

Felix's strong face was tight with seriousness. "Alice, round up your family and tell them to meet up underground. I'll go and rally the Volturi.  
This is _molto male _ news!"

**What is Felix so upset about? What news could possibly be so serious that an underground gathering of vampires is called for?  
Stay tuned and find out next chapter!**

**1: Mon cheri-French for "my darling"**

**2: Benvenuto a Italia-Welcome to Italy**

**3: Castello-Castle**

**4: Tesoro-Treasure**

**5: Signora piccolo-Little Miss**

**6: Motoguzzi-Italian motorcycle brand**

**7: Vespa-Italian motorcycle, vespa means "wasp"**

**8: Vaniglia francese-French vanilla**

**9: Fragola-Strawberry**

**10: Supplementare! Supplementare! Leggagli tutti-Extra! Extra! Read all about it!**

**11: Accenda, shoo-Go away, shoo!**

**12: Santa Maria. Per l'amor di Dio- Saint Mary. For the love of God!**

**13: Molto male-Very bad**


	4. Trentino Train Trouble

**Chapter 4 is heeere!  
Thank you readers for all the hits and reviews so far!**** Last weekend I saw Hollow Man 2, the movie that stars Peter Facinelli. (Squeal!)****  
If you are a fan of Carlisle, you should take time to watch that movie this summer.  
Ahem, anyway, back to the Cullens' _cronaca (_chronicle).**

**Chapter 4: Trentino Train Trouble**

The meadows were very quiet and tranquil, except for the chirping of birds and the wind blowing through the grass. So when Carlisle's cell phone vibrated and the ringtone rang, both Carlisle and Esme jumped at the sudden noise. Esme got up so that Carlisle could fumble in his pocket and pull out his cell phone. He checked who was calling and sighed.

'_It must be Alice: calling in to tell me her whole shopping history during the last few hours._' He thought. Nevertheless he slid his cell phone open and answered.

"Yes Alice...?"

"Carlisle, there's no time to explain!" Alice's voice came over the phone loud and urgent. "Felix wants the whole family and the Volturi coven in the sewers, like, now!"

"What-?"

"I told you, no time to explain! I gotta call the others!"

Alice hung up.

Esme had listened through the whole conversation while she put up her drawing tools. "What did Alice want?"

"She says that Felix is calling an underground meeting. And the Volturi only do that when something extremely serious has happened."

Carlisle looked around the beautiful countryside with sadness and held Esme's hand. "We have to get back to the city and see what's up."

Esme tightened her grip on his hand. "I'm with you." She replied with determination. Then, as fast as they went up the hill, they sped down and made for the city of Volterra within minutes.

Xx0xX

As soon as the couple arrived within the city's proximity, they took dark, rarely-used roads to reach the alleys of the Volturi castle. Carlisle and Esme went down the very same porthole that Bella, Alice and Edward had used during their previous visit to Italy. With their enhanced golden-eyed vision, Carlisle and Esme had no problem walking down the dark, dank corridors and catching sight of a tiny figure holding up a lantern. At first Carlisle thought it was Alice, but then he realized it was Jane from the hooded cloak she wore.

"Good. You're here. Follow me."

After a few turns and jumping over rivers of sewer waters, they arrived at a dimly lighted cavern. The only sources of light were large candles posted on the four proximities of the circular room. This was the catacombs under the castle plaza where the Volturi would gather to discuss the most confidential matters. At the center of the room most of the Volturi members have already arrived. The only non-Volturi vampire among them was Alice, who stood next to Felix. Bella was also with them. When Alice saw Jane bringing in Carlisle and Esme, her face lit up in the dark.

"Great, you came! We just need to wait for the other people now!"

Soon Rosalie and Emmett, who were escorted by Demetri, filed in. The last people to come were Edward and Jasper. Since Edward was the fastest member of the Cullens, he was sent by Aro to go fetch Jasper at the Vatican. Everyone took their places among the rocky outcrops that jutted out from the floor or the walls. Aro began to speak.

"_Fratellos, sorellas, and amicos_. We have a serious matter in our hands. Felix, present your case."

All eyes turned to Felix, and the newspaper that he held up. Then everyone's eyes changed from curiousness to astonishment, save for the Cullens, as they read the headlines printed in bold:

**Trentino treno distrutto, Giaccomazza sfugge!**

**(Trentino Train Wrecked, Giaccomazza escapes!)**

"Hey, that's the same train we took from France to Italy!" Emmett gasped.

"Escaped from prison? But how?" Carlisle's calm demeanor was shaken. "I thought you were able to foresee this!"

"That's the problem." Marcus growled. "Giaccomazza has this strange ability of blocking out all manipulation on his mind and body."

"The same ability that Bella has?" Jasper asked.

"Yes. And now that he's on the loose." Said Demetri from the very back of the room. "I'm unable to track him down. Never in my life have I been unable to catch my bounty. _E molto frustrante_."

While all this was going on, the rest of the Cullens were very confused. Alice plucked up her courage to interrupt the conversation briefly.

"Wait a human minute...who is this Giaccomacco guy you're talking about?"

"Giaccomazza," Carlisle corrected. "is a very infamous Italian criminal, and vampire, who is charged with countless crimes of kidnapping a whole bunch of people at once. Humans think that he may have sold them to foreign countries as slaves. But we vampires believe that he keeps them as hostages for future meals." There was a hint of disgust in Carlisle's voice. Everyone knew only too well how he hated the concept of vampires and their natural food source.

"That's why we call him the _Leopardo_." Said Caius. "When leopards kill their prey, they take it up to the trees and hang the animals' heads between the branches. A lot like Giaccomazza kidnapping and imprisoning humans."

"Thanks for the nature lecture, Caius." Marcus said sarcastically. "Now, back to business. The newspaper doesn't have much information that we find useful. But it does say that the incident happened around three to four o' clock. It's also been reported that 14 people are missing. In a minute, Heidi will come here and report to us all the details that only a vampire could uncover."

As soon as Marcus was finished speaking a pale, beautiful vampire with mahogany hair glided in. She had a notebook in her hand.

Emmett leaned toward Alice and whispered into her ear.

"Look at Rosalie glaring daggers at that Heidi person. What's up with her?"

"Put it this way." Alice whispered back. "Rosalie's used to being the prettiest vampire in the room. And she is pretty. No doubt about that. But this Heidi is gorgeous too. Rosalie's suddenly not the Queen Bee. And it's making her squirm."

Hearing this exchange between Alice and Emmett, Edward decided to eavesdrop on Rosalie's thoughts.

'_Why couldn't that Heidi be old? And ugly? Hair falling out? And toothless? I would like to give her a total make over. Ha!_' Rosalie smirked evilly after her bout of envious sulking. Edward tried not to laugh. Then he centered his focus back to the meeting when Heidi began to speak.

"According to what I have seen, I have written down these observations:

One: The Leopardo and six other men wore matching black tuxedoes.

Two: From this note, I was able to see them snatch up about sixteen people and flee the train. I don't think anyone else could have seen it.

Three: A fire was deliberately set to burn diesel fuel. That's what caused the smoke."

"Very good, Heidi." Aro said. "The kidnappings happened too fast for any news reporter to fully analyze the situation. And the paper was off by 2 numbers when it came to counting the missing people."

"But I sense something different about this scheme." Carlisle said. "What made the Leopardo pull off such a thing in a public place? Normally he would make his kidnappings subtle."

"Well, he did go on the same train as us. "Edward said. "Could he possibly pick up our scent?"

The Cullens looked at one another in horror.

"If that criminal continues his activities near us, we could be exposed! What he wants to do is to get his revenge on us! And he used the Cullens' scent to find his way here!" Marcus slammed a fist against the wall. The walls vibrated slightly from the impact. Esme's beautiful face was a picture of devastation.

"We're so sorry that we came! We had no idea that we would create problems for your coven!"

"No need to apologize." Aro smiled soothingly. "Of course you wouldn't bring in a killer vampire intentionally."

"Think about it, Marcus." Said Demetri. "If the Leopardo is on the loose here in our area, we might have the slightest chance of catching that criminal."

"Yes, that could work." Aro mused.

"Cool! We're gonna be official criminal-catchers!" Emmett looked like he was going to burst from excitement. "We need a catchy name for our family. Ooh, I got it! How about CIA: Cullens-In-Action?"

"NO EMMETT!" By now, all the Cullens were sick and tired of him.

"Actually, I like that name." Felix said. "It's way better than Volturi."

"What!?" Aro exclaimed. "How can you not like our awesome name?"

"Think about it, Aro." Demetri replied with irritation. "**V**olterra's **O**live-**L**oving **T**eam **U**nder the **R**egion of **I**taly...it is an amazingly stupid name for a regal coven of royal vampires! I mean, if we didn't have such a ridiculous name and a ridiculous love for olives, the Leopardo would still be in our coven right now!"

'_Volterra's Olive-Loving Team Under the Region of Italy_!?' The Cullens bit down on their lips to keep from howling with laughter.

Aro scoffed. "The name was my brothers' idea."

"DON'T GIVE US THAT EXCUSE!" Marcus and Caius hollered.

"Aw come on, every Italian loves olives. And if you don't, well, you're out of the club!"

"We do love olives! We just wish that our name could've been cooler!"

Jane, Felix, Heidi and Alec murmured in agreement with what Demetri said.

"Hold on a sec..." Carlisle waved his hands. "The Leopardo got exiled from the coven because he _didn't like olives_!?"

The Volturi vampires nodded their heads.

"THAT'S THE MOST RETARDED THING I'VE EVER HEARD!" Emmett blurted out.

"But I don't like olives." Carlisle said. "And still, you let me stay with the coven for a few decades."

"Well, that was before we made up all the olive rules." Aro waved a hand dismissively. "When we did add those rules in the 1900s, however, that was the time when the Leopardo had joined our group."

"Even those he's a criminal now and might kill us, I'm kind of glad he got kicked out." Jane spoke up for herself for the first time. "He was always making fun of us."

"That _pizza volto_ was no normal Italian, that Leopardo. _E troppo pazzo_." Aro shook his head. Then he clapped his hands to restore order.

"Now that we have information on the Leopardo's whereabouts, let's all try our best to nab that pizza face for good!"

"Whoo-hoo! The Cullens-In-Action are on the case!"

Despite the seriousness of the situation, everyone couldn't help but relieve their stress and laugh at the sight of Emmett singing the James Bond theme at the top of his lungs and walking about the room all sneaky-like.

**Are the Cullens up to the job of successfully catching a criminal vampire? What ingenious plans can they think up of before it's too late? And are you wondering how the Volturi survived with their retarded name for the past one thousand years??**

**Yeah, not much translations here, but I hoped you're enjoying the story so far. .**

**Neglecting to review is a sin!! (Just kidding, but it would make me happy if I could hear opinions from other people) I appreciate constructive praise and criticism, lol.  
**

**1: Fratellos, sorellas and amicos-Brothers, sisters and friends**

**2: E molto frustrante-It's very frustrating.**

**3: Leopardo-Leopard**

**4: Pizza volto-Pizza Face**

**5: E troppo pazzo-And crazy, too.**


	5. Think Evil Thoughts!

**Hi, readers and fans of the story! I'm really sorry for taking so long;  
I was away at Seaworld for a whole month! I have a tendency to be so busy, that I couldn't update chapters for half a year!  
Remember: where there are Italian words in Italics, there's a translation at the bottom of the chapter! (Winks)**

**Chapter—uh, what was it again? Oh, 5! Whoops…title slip. :P**

**Chapter 5: Think Evil Thoughts**

For the Cullens and the Volturi, operation Leopardo had been going underway. Because of the high threats within the city, the vampires had to be extremely careful in handling their information and actions. The Volturi coven was strictly reclining underground to avoid any public attention.  
The Cullens, who were naturally more comfortable being around the human society, insisted that they try and gather information from the surface. Aro, Marcus and Caius reluctantly agreed. But on one condition: the family members have to wear black uniform cloaks and address each other by codenames.  
Of course, Emmett is thrilled with the whole undercover sensation.

That night the family gathered underground once more to discuss their methods of operation. Aro led the meeting.

"Since I am so indestructible and awesome, I will be the one to decide your codenames. Your normal names simply won't do in an Italian city when you have to blend in. Carlisle, you will revert back to your Italian nickname: Stregoni Benefici."

"That sounds like a pasta dish." Emmett snickered.

Carlisle turned to scowl at him and Emmett only laughed harder.

"The rest of your names I had to make up:

Edward-Eduardo

Alice-Alicia

Jasper-Jorge

Emmett-Emilio

Esme-Elena

Rosalie-Roselia

"Hey, isn't Roselia a Pokemon's name?" Jasper was the video game freak of the family. (Note the PSP from chapter 2)

Aro was about to continue, but at Jasper's interruption Aro looked unusually annoyed. "Do you have a problem with my naming skills?"

At this question the Volturi vampires burst out laughing. Aro was seething as he glared at his fellow colleagues. "I wasn't talking to you."

Alec was doubled up on the floor laughing his head off. "Just to make a point here." He said. "Your naming skills are not exactly up to…professional standards."

Aro stood by in extreme embarrassment as the Volturi laughed even harder and clutched their sides. They laughed so hard, they could have been crying, if that were physically possible.

"I think you gave us all great nicknames." Carlisle said politely. "There's nothing wrong with your choice of names. Only a true Italian would name us after Italian food."

The Volturi eventually stopped laughing and looked up at Aro sheepishly. "We're sorry we made fun of you."

Aro, who felt much better after what Carlisle said, cheerfully forgave the other vampires.

'_He's got major mood swings_,' Edward thought.

Then Aro cleared his throat.

"Er, ahem, back to business. Now that your names are taken care of, we must discuss ways that we thwart the Leopardo. Now that we have the Cullens with us, perhaps we may have the chance to nab him."

"I don't know, Aro." Said Marcus. "Time and time again the Leopardo always slipped past our clutches. The worst scenario was when he fled to Mexico and managed to remain undetected for 50 years. Then by the time we know about his crimes, he vanishes like the mist under a new moon."

"That's because we have been relying on human news, since Demetri can't hunt him down." Said Caius. "So far, we've been very unsuccessful."

Aro sighed. "The Leopardo _e stupido, _but he's very, very clever. He may have unpredictable methods, but we all know that he has the ultimate criminal mind."

"Wait, Aro." Carlisle intervened. "Say that last sentence again."

"Erm…the Leopardo has the ultimate criminal mind, no doubt…"

"That's it! The reason why he's always eluding you is that you all have your minds thinking the wrong way!"

"What do you mean by that, Stregoni?" inquired Heidi.

"What I mean is, you're all thinking like _la polizia_. Normally, what you do is hunt down vampires that threaten to expose our secrets, right? Just like the police!"

The Volturi ancients and guards nodded slowly. They still didn't seem to catch his drift. Neither did the Cullens. Except for Edward. With his mind-reading ability, he knows where Carlisle is heading with his explanation.

"But this time," Edward intervened excitedly. "We must think the complete opposite…"

"We must think…like criminals!" Carlisle said.

The Volturi gaped.

"That's uncalled for!" Caius hissed. "What kind of example would we be to our kind if we submit to doing evil deeds!?"

Carlisle held up his hands. He wasn't quite done yet. "I didn't mean that we should go off and actually become criminals."

"We must think evil thoughts." Edward said, reading Carlisle's thoughts. "To catch the Leopardo will require an unusual plan. A diabolical plan that must be put together in an unusual way. We must think in a way that's hard for us. But easy for a bad guy like the Leopardo."

Carlisle grinned. "Exactly, Edward."

"Wait," Alice piped up. "You're getting me more confused than ever. How can we think like bad guys when we're used to playing the hero part?"

"Yeah, guys. Can you dumb it down? You lost me since that police part." 'Leave it to Emmett to not understand anything.' Rosalie rolled her eyes.

Carlisle and Edward exchanged a glance. Both of them leaned forward a little, as if they were going to tell the other vampires a really big secret. Carlisle almost whispered the answer. "We must become stupid, but clever criminals. Criminals who kidnap bunches of people.  
Criminals who fly those humans away to sell them as slaves or a future meal. We must become the Leopardo in our heads."

"Carlisle and I will try to think this through. Maybe the Volturi can help, too." Edward said. "Until then, the rest of us must remain low and quiet."

"Okay, while you guys go ahead and summon your magical thinking skills, Bella and I are going to rampage Volterra's mall.  
Then after that we can try out that new gelato flavor of chocolate, strawberry, vanilla, banana _and_ coffee put together!"

"But Alice," Bella said uneasily. "That's going to require a lot of money…"

Alice snorted. "Financial problems? Within the Cullen family? Puh-leez.  
With Carlisle's credit cards in my arsenal, there is no item out there that's too pricey for the likes of us!"

Rosalie glanced warily at Heidi, who was engaged in a busy conversation between the Volturi ancients. "Do you mind if I come, too?"

"Sure, Rose. We could always have another shopping partner." Bella suggested nicely. Rosalie grinned back at her timidly.

"Yay!" Alice practically jumped in the air. "Just us girls!"

The rest of the Cullens looked back as the girls walked out from the underground base.

"I hope those girls will be careful, especially Bella." Esme whispered.

"I just hope that Alice won't use up all my credit cards." Carlisle joked lightly.

"How did she get your credit cards?"

"I really have no idea, Edward. Alice will be Alice."

Xx0xX

"Rose, that's the sixteenth outfit you tried on already! And you look good in all of them!"

"No Alice! It has to be perfect!"

The girls in question were trying out many of _Castel Romano's _fashion trends. They would spend hours in the changing room, sampling all the clothing that Alice handpicked herself. When Rosalie did not approve of any of them, Alice went out to pick out another batch of clothes.  
(The changing rooms allowed carrying only eight items at once when trying them out.) Bella sat on a stool a little way from the changing room's door. For the past two hours she watched Alice flit back and forth, carrying clothes to and from the changing room. Sure Rosalie can be dainty, but she was never this picky.  
Bella went in with Alice, who was carrying a fourth batch of clothing.

While Rosalie was busy switching in and out of tops, Alice and Bella sat on the little bench in their stall. It was then when Alice figured out the reason behind Rosalie's unusual behavior. The smallest of the Cullens decided to tantalize her blond sister for a little bit.

"Seriously, Rose, why are you so worked up on that Heidi? We all already know that you're way prettier than her."

At the mention of Heidi, Rosalie's eyes narrowed slightly and she unbuttoned a top with more force than necessary.

"I don't need Edward's mind-reading power to know that you're jealous of her. She hasn't done anything to you. You're not a victim. Except maybe of your own imagination. Get a life!"

There! She said it!

Even though Alice just meant to tease and not insult her, Rosalie's pretty pale cheeks puffed out and her eyes began to twitch. She was so angry she nearly ripped out the fabric when she took off the top with buttons.

The sight was so comical; Bella had to hold her stomach to keep in her silent laughter.

Rosalie turned her whole body toward Alice. She was trembling with anger from head to toe.

"You, little missy, need to mind your own business! And keep your opinions to yourself!"

Alice didn't even flinch when she saw Rosalie's harsh scowl. She grinned and put out both of her hands in a dismissive girly gesture.

"Relax, drama queen. I was only pointing out what everyone's thinking. It's that obvious."

Rosalie still did not let go of her anger. She went out of the changing room and returned the clothing to the racks herself. The girls ended up getting out of the store without spending a dime. That is, until they found an ice cream stand nearby.

"I'm gonna get that new sundae with all the flavors! Bella, you want one too?"

Bella was staring uneasily at the sample, which had ice cream scoops that were stacked a little higher than Bella's head.

"Erm, I think I'll just share with you."

"Sure! Rose—I mean Roselia, you want some gelato?"

"No, thank you." Came out Rosalie's curt reply.

Alice nodded and turned to the cashier. She swiped an impressive-looking credit card through the machine. Then she took the sundae from the cashier and winked at him. As they left the stand, Bella could feel the stares of people that also lined up for ice cream. The cashier was probably staring too.

"Let's back to the castle. The sunlight gets really strong starting at noon." Bella said.

Alice was wolfing down her ice cream while walking. She put down her spoon to glance at her wristwatch then up at the brightening sky.

"Shoot, you're right. It's ten till noon. Let's get back in fast."

At the alley Felix and Demetri were standing guard over the porthole. As soon as they saw the girls, they took the liberty to escort them to the underground base.

In the main room, everyone was huddled tightly together in discussion. The Cullens heard the girls' entrance, and they looked up.

"Oh. Back already?" Jasper, being Alice's mate, knew that Alice was capable of staying in a mall much longer than a mere three hours.

Alice shrugged. "The only thing we spent money on was a gelato sundae."

"Didn't like the outfits, huh?" Edward inquired.

"Well, Rosalie didn't." Alice elbowed her sister lightly. "So, what did you guys do when we were gone?"

Emmett grinned so wide that the dimples looked like holes in his face.

"We just came up with the most evil, most diabolical plan ever in vampire history! It's a plan so wicked, we could put even James and Victoria to shame!"

**So what exactly is their so-called diabolical plan? Were Carlisle and Edward right about thinking like bad guys?  
Do you think Alice's remarks to Rosalie will help her?  
Or just make her madder? And more confused?  
All of those questions may be answered in the next chapter: Hunting Ducks!  
Why that name? I'll leave you try and figure that out. Don't forget to tell me what you think of the story so far!**

**1: La polizia-The police**

**2: Castel Romano-An Italian fashion outlet**


	6. Hunting Ducks

**Finally, Chapter 6!!!**

**I'm sorry about the extremely long wait; I'm sure you guys are very excited for this new chapter. Well, enjoy!**

**Chapter 6: Hunting Ducks**

"So Emmett, you've come up with a new plan for capturing the Leopardo, huh? Is it truly—what's the word for it? Diabolical?" Alice asked.

Carlisle sat back on his perch. He motioned to Edward to start talking about their "grand plan."

Edward leaned forward and spoke softly. "Carlisle and I have been brainstorming for a while, and we've come up with a few prodigious ideas before you guys got here.  
It is important, as I'm sure you know, to always be ready in case something goes haywire."

Aro looked confused. Caius turned to Alice and held out both palms as if to say, "I don't understand."

Alice interrupted. "Edward, I think they don't understand the word 'haywire.'" She looked at Caius. "It means 'to go wrong,' I think. That would be a good way to put it. 'In case something goes wrong.'"

"Sorry," Edward apologized. "All those repeating years of high school's gotten into me. I'll try not to use confusing words." He went on, "The idea of an evil plan was taking shape in our talks even as the Leopardo got on the train to Bolzano, according to Heidi. Demetri was kind enough to offer what he called a 'clue' to capturing the Leopardo once and for all. It made sense, since he does a living of doing in bad guys. He said, 'Think about duck hunting.' And the light went on in my head."

Edward, realizing he had once again used an American metaphor, quickly added, "I understood at once at how we should go about catching that human-nabbing crook this time."

"So, what is the plan? You're talking in riddles, Edward." Rosalie, impatient to get to the answer, wanted to know.

Carlisle stepped in to take the floor and begin to answer Rosalie's—and everyone's—questions. Edward smiled and sat back.

"A good plan," Carlisle began, "a clever plan that has a chance of succeeding cannot just be told. No, a truly evil and diabolical plan must be discovered. Step by step. I'll try and tell you in small steps about our suggestions.  
If I am successful, you'll each discover the plan for yourselves, ok?"

"Fair enough, my dear Carlisle." Aro said. "Go ahead, _per favore_."

"I'll begin with a question. Just to get everyone thinking. And to keep Emmett from being bored to death." He winked at his son, who was twirling a finger around the curls of his hair.  
Suddenly he sprang up and saluted.

"I'm paying attention, sir! I won't let you down this time!"

"You salute with your right hand, idiot." Jasper hissed.

Emmett rapidly switched hands and kept his wide grin.

Carlisle continued. "Here's my question; it's for all the members of the Volturi. Tell me three things that Italy produces that are the best of their kind?  
Not best according to only Italians. But known as the best by all the world?"

Marcus stared at the floor for a moment, then exchanged glances with his fellow brothers.

Aro opened his mouth and left it in a shape of a big O, as if he was about to suggest "olives," but thought it best not to suggest it.

They gathered close together like a football huddle before a big game. After a few seconds, Aro turned back to Carlisle.

"The first thing we will name is not olives, unfortunately, but ice cream. We believe the whole world knows that our gelato is simply the best. Nobody makes better ice cream than Italians. Do you agree?"

Carlisle glanced at Alice. The little pixie-like vampire was bobbing her head with great enthusiasm. Carlisle cracked a grin at one side of his face.

"Yes, Aro. We agree; Italian gelato is the best ice cream in the world. Blue Bell and Haagen-Dazs are simply no match for its superiority. Now, what's your second choice?"

"It's only been a few minutes, but man am I starving for some more! Can we get some gelato, Carlisle? This time, for everyone in the family?" Alice pleaded.

As Aro and his brothers compared thoughts quietly between themselves and the Volturi guard, Carlisle gave Alice fifteen Euros and sent her to get eight gelati. "Eight different flavors on each one, Alice. It doesn't matter which."

This time it was Marcus who turned to address Carlisle and Edward. He was ready with their second answer. "We think the world would agree that Italians make the best motorcycles, too," he said.

"_Motoguzzi _for the win!" Emmett pumped a fist in the air.

"Right you are, Marcus," Edward said. "Nobody makes a better cycle than _Motoguzzi_. Fast and ripped is how I like it here in Italy. So that's two; what's your third choice?"

"I don't see what ice cream and motorcycles have to do with catching criminals, Carlisle. When is this going to make some sense?" Rosalie was getting frustrated with Carlisle and Edward's little riddle. "When will you get to the point here? That Leopardo is running amok out there while we're sitting here on our butts playing riddles." She said. "Edward started out with something about duck hunting.  
I don't see what ice cream and motorcycles have to do with ducks. Or criminals. Or hunting either of them. This whole thing is pissing me off!!!" Rosalie was wringing her hands, as if she was strangling a victim's neck.

"Have some gelato, Rose. It'll chill you out." Alice walked in the door carefully carrying a huge silver tray. On it were eight bowls of delectable gelato. "Here Rosalie, we got you gelato _nocciolino. _And, no, it's not because we think you're a nut. Even though you are, sometimes. Like right now," Alice laughed. And everyone in the room laughed with her. Even Rosalie, whose favorite ice cream flavor was hazelnut. She knew why her sister had gotten her that flavor.  
And it made her happy that she had remembered.

Carlisle resumed control of the meeting as everyone dug into their bowls of gelato. "So now we've agreed. Ice cream and motorcycles are two excellent Italian products. What would you say is a third?"

"Shotguns, Carlisle." It wasn't any of the brothers spoke up; it was Demetri. "Italians make the world's most wicked shotguns. Is that what you had in mind?"

"You've hit the nail on the spot, Demetri!" Carlisle, unlike his normal quiet self, was actually getting a little excited. You could see it behind the gleam in his golden eyes. "And who uses shotguns for sport, I ask you?  
At least who is one group to whom shotguns are extremely important?" Without waiting for an answer, Carlisle plunged ahead. "Duck hunters, that's who."

"So there you have it. The three things we can all agree are the best in the world and come from Italy…ice cream, motorcycles and shotguns.  
These are the keys to this grand plan. Now, at last, we must shut away our sense of justice and nobility and think evil thoughts."

"Is everything becoming clear to you yet?" Carlisle continued. "Are you beginning to see the diabolical plan we're hatching here? No? Not yet? Then Edward here will fill you in on how we'll exploit the  
most excellent reputations of all three of these great products to catch that criminal vampire. And put him out of human-nabbing business; once and for all time."

Carlisle smiled. A dark, almost sinister grin grew from that smile in a way similar to how a demon reacted when it pulled off a disastrous prank. The whole family felt chills creeping up their spines just looking at it. Or was it the gelato chilling them?

Emmett leaned over to Jasper to whisper in his ear.

"I'm glad Carlisle's on our side, man. I'd hate to be the guy that would piss him off."

Seeing that Carlisle and Edward had nothing more to say, Aro clapped his hands together. "Right, troops! Meeting is adjourned!"

Some Volturi members lingered in the room while others dispersed to different parts of the castle.

Alice, catching sight of Esme's unfinished bowl of gelato, gleefully took the opportunity to swipe it away for herself. Esme didn't appear to notice; she remained in her seat and addressed her husband.

"In some ways, Rosalie is right." Esme sighed. "Where are you going with this plan, Carlisle? I just can't see how duck hunters with ice cream and shotguns can stop the Leopardo…" Unlike Rosalie, she didn't show any trace of exasperation or annoyance. There was just worry and genuine concern in her eyes and voice. Carlisle made sure that no one was looking in their direction, and he wove his arms around her waist and pressed his cheek against hers affectionately.

"Not to worry, love," the breath of his whisper tickled her ear. "Edward and I have this down one step ahead each time. You just wait until tomorrow when you'll finally get it. I may be a medical doctor, but we surgeons  
can always be part mad scientist whenever the job calls for it." Carlisle tapped a finger against the side of his head and made the loco sign. Esme lightened up and laughed, now that she was assured about her husband's ingenuity.

"Just as long as your plan doesn't involve chucking ice cream globs. Alice will think it would be blasphemy to waste it on an olive-hating criminal!" Esme joked.

**How will ice cream, motorcycles, shotguns and Carlisle's wayward plan help our favorite vamps catch the Leopardo? And what of duck hunters?  
What do they have to do with anything? Is he talking about duck hunters who ride motorcycles and eat ice cream?  
Find out in the next chapter: The Bait…8 'Painted Ducks!'**

**1: Per fevore-Please**

**2: Motoguzzi-Italian motorcycle manufacturer**


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